How to get your ex back (follow these 7 steps!)
How to get your ex back?
If you have experienced deep and true love you will know just how magical and blissful an experience it can be.
Romantic, intimate and sexual partners are here to show us parts of ourselves and to help us grow, and this is especially true if you have been blessed with a soulmate as a girlfriend or boyfriend.
Relationships can make us feel alive, full of energy and the universal life force that flows through this world and the earth, and confident and self- expressive.
They can even connect us to expanded and evolved creativity, imaginative self- expression and unique artistic or intellectual gifts and talents. Quite simply, love is the fuel to our inner flames.
So, when this “light goes out,” this often leaves us feeling disconnected from ourselves and the world around.
We may possess a strong intuitive knowing and internal pull- an instinctual force birthed from both physicality and the higher self saying that we are meant to be with this person, and that the breakup or split is only temporary. You should always listen to your heart and higher self (the higher mind!) and follow your inner joy and bliss.
Without further ado, here are the most powerful and profound ways to attract an ex back into your life and rekindle the flame.
1.Self- love is key
Possibly the most important thing to be aware of is the significance of self- love. When you love yourself, your inner vibration ripples out and affects your external reality.
People pick up on the love and respect you have for yourself, they can feel your subtle intentions, emotional well – being and mental- psychological state of health and harmony.
With self- love one gives out an aura or demeanour, stating “I am content and blissful within my own self and being. I love myself and am worthy, possess amazing self- esteem, and am kind to myself. I have self- compassion and self- awareness and seek to treat others with the same love and adoration I give to myself.” It is a beautiful quality and frequency to have and hold and one which is incredibly attractive!
Please note self- love should not be confused with narcissism or egocentricity. To have self- love is to actively and consciously engage in self- care and spiritual enhancement and perception.
You begin to see yourself and the world in a conscious, loving, interconnected and empowered way, with compassion and empathy as the foundation. Narcissism is defined by selfishness and self- centeredness as the motivation of all actions and behaviours.
Narcissists are primarily focused on the “I” or ego and live to serve themselves, often at the expense of others. Their “self- love” is also delusional- it is not rooted in beauty, honesty or empathy but in a distorted perception of self and reality which further allows them to treat others in less than kind and pure ways. Self- love is the complete opposite.
2. A Positive mindset
Health is a state of mind. Mind is a state of frequency. The law of attraction (LOA) works on the natural laws of vibration and frequency. The significance? A positive healthy mindset is a key ingredient in your capacity for success!
Engaging in meditation, mindfulness, sound therapy and healing, soulwork, self- development through metaphysics, spirituality and philosophy, and techniques such as neuro- linguistic programming or self- therapy will shift your conscious mind from negative to positive, pessimistic to optimistic, and suffering from lack or “poverty consciousness” to abundance and prosperity consciousness.
Consciousness is the basis of mental, emotional and spiritual health. It is also the foundation for love and success in living your best life, or becoming the best version of yourself.
Once we start to shift the way we perceive, think and feel, we begin to actively change and affect physical reality- and this includes relationships. Authentic bonds and connections can be formed, or re- formed, through a positive mindset.
Hint: Don’t confuse positivity and optimism with ignorance or avoidance. There is a difference between choosing to overlook and repress or avoid real problems or issues, and mindfully- with full awareness- choose to see things in an optimistic light. Being positive involves an internal shift in perception and conscious awareness.
3. Learn to adapt and embrace the journey
The ability to adapt and be flexible is paramount in attracting your ex. So is surrendering to the journey. If you are always living in the future or a “when” or “what if” scenario, how can you expect to enjoy life in the present?
All manifestation starts in the now- in each current moment. When you feel good you attract more of the same. Being content, peaceful and happy by yourself is essential to achieving happiness in a relationship. Also, recognizing that everything happens in divine timing can help you to embody self- acceptance.
What if you are meant to be together but one or both partners needed to do some healing, self- development and learning? Life involves growth and cycles and nothing is transient! But everything is transient and this teaching should be applied to the period of separation you and your soulmate or sweetheart experience. Surrender, be adaptable and embrace the journey. Your time is coming!
4. Accept your own shadow
The shadow self and its acceptance is integral to rekindling a flame and coming back together with your lover once more. It has been mentioned many times but needs to be shared again; we all have a light and a dark, a shine and a shadow.
The shadow self is the parts of personality and self often undesired, repressed and denied- the parts we may see as dark, impure or unholy. Yet the shadow self is a fundamental part of being human, it is part of the human experience!
Accepting and also taking steps to embody, balance and integrate your shadow self is therefore highly important to your capacity for true love and intimacy. A lot of sexual fantasies and desires, including lust and eroticism, are associated with the shadow self. It is the denial or repression of such things that leads to imbalance and a lot of the problems we see today in sexual and intimate partnerships.
5. Heal yourself!
Just like self- love and accepting your shadow healing yourself is another key pointer. Healing is wholeness and we can’t expect to be harmonious, happy and healthy in a relationship if we are not these things inside first.
Self- healing includes self- care- massage, taking relaxing baths with essential oils, reading and having you time, immersing yourself in fun creative and artistic expression, going on peaceful nature walks, self- therapy such as meditation and sound therapy, and generally being kind and gentle to yourself.
Soul searching and “shadow work” can also be extremely profound in your healing journey, and this refers to exploring your subconscious and shadow self through the use of dreams, journaling and introspective activities. Your subconscious mind is linked closely to emotions and hidden or behind the scenes beliefs, feelings and internal currents.
Getting to the root and truth of these unseen motivational forces and factors will open you up to new pathways for health, well- being and self- awareness- the key ingredients to any successful and sparkling relationship.
6. Become your own soulmate, best friend and lover…
Soulmates is something which need to be acknowledged. We have toxic love and soulmate love; “karmic” love where we are still plagued by lower vibrational behaviors and thinking patterns, and “higher” love where connection operates on a higher frequency functioning.
To attract the ideal partner you must first be the ideal partner, and vice versa. No- one likes someone who is possessive, overly- jealous, bitter and argumentative or mean- spirited.
Qualities such as empathy, compassion, emotional intelligence and depth, inner beauty, intelligence, intuition, kindness and sincerity are deeply beautiful and attractive.
Unless you are hoping to get back with a narcissist (and we really hope you aren’t!) no- one will think these things weird, strange or undesirable- unless, again, you are dealing with someone of an immature mental and emotional capacity. Thus, to rekindle the flame you need to be your own best friend and lover.
Soulmates are here to teach us about parts of ourselves and then ultimately share in that love and awareness. Furthermore, being confident, self- assured and soulfully independent are extremely attractive qualities to possess. Knowing thyself is sexy!
7. Follow Your Passion(s)
Finally- but certainly not any less significant, a person who follows their passion and lives by their truth is one of the most attractive and magnetic characteristics anyone could hope to embody.
Passion is the spark of life, the seed of desire, and the catalyst for positive and exciting change. Without passion, life can become stagnant and un-zestful lacking in life and vitality. And your partner picks up on this…
Step into the super- confident, optimistic, joyful, self- expressive, wise and perceptive person that you are. Be soulful, serious and ambitious, playful and light- hearted, intuitive and sensual.
Live your life with grace and self- autonomy whilst also opening yourself to authentic connection and depth… Be affectionate, loving, kind and wise. Most importantly, take steps to heal and step fully into your divine and empowered self. Self- love is the key.